Random selections of other blogs. Note: I am not responsible for content on other blogs.
A friend of mine referred me to this site today. It's too bad I didn't find it before I had a professional surgeon do my lasik surgery. I could have done it at home in the kitchen.
Lasik at Home
When you go there, make sure you click on the tab that says "Four Easy Steps."
With the rising cost of gasoline and airfare, I thought I might brainstorm a few ways you could “vacation at home” this summer.
1. You could pull weeds and tell yourself you’re on a "jungle safari."
2. Throw your garden hose on the roof and enjoy a personal waterfall. If you move it around every few minutes, you’ll also water your grass.
3. Ladies, have your husband bring breakfast in bed and pretend it is room service. OK, that one may be a stretch.
Let me encourage you to make LifePoint a part of your summer activities. The need to stay connected to God never goes on vacation. In fact, summer is a great time to get involved, lend a hand, or spend time hanging out with fellow LifePointers.
In the due course of doing "competitive" research for Blue Haven, I came across this site called "Redneck Pool Heater." Warning: it contains pictures of real rednecks. You have read it to believe it.
The toilet in our second bathroom decided to quit working yesterday. Actually, it was working but it had developed a leak inside the tank that caused it to fill up REALLY slow. So, in my earnest but misguided own way, I decided to check it out. Fast forward to shoving a towel under the hose and spending nearly an hour on my back looking up with a mixture of futility and despair burned on my face.
Here are a few lessons my toilet taught me:
1. Know the limits of your own ability.
2. Never twist something that wasn't designed to be twisted.
3. The right tools will make the job go much smoother.
4. Never try to fix what isn't completely broken until your in-laws leave.
One of the lesson’s I learned while battling a recent cold ... cable news networks only track three stories at a time and use 12 different anchors to tell you the same thing, but in a slightly different way. And whenever a lead-in proclaims, "Breaking News" ... it’s probably not.
As I'm returning from lunch at Quiznos (I highly recommended the Prime Rib and Peppercorn sandwich on Rosemary Parmesan bread) I pass this homeless fellow carrying his bags, etc., and his portable radio. In my younger, more hip days we called them boomboxes.
What is this fellow listening to? A song from Les Miserables -- "On My Own," the solo by Eponine.
Click here to read more about "On My Own" on Wikipedia.
It's official -- I've been trained to make coffee. In order to continue consuming mass quantities of free coffee at work, I had to go to training. That seemed fair enough to me. Now I'm dangerous ...
The following is a true story:
I'm waiting in line at the local Subway near our house, waiting to grab some sandwiches to take to the Padres game. The lady ahead of me in line orders a "Veggie Delight," Subway's all-veggie sandwich. When the fellow behind the counter finishes with the veggies, the lady asks him, "Where's the meat?" Without missing a step, he simply asked her if she wanted turkey.
Saw this on the job section of Craigslist. No commentary needed -- it speaks for itself.
*****
2 Male Models needed for daughters birthday
Reply to:
Date: 2007-04-25, 12:43AM PDT
I am looking for 2 gorgeous guys to carry my daughter on a chair as an entrance to her 13th birthday toga party. You will need to dress in Toga attire, be in great shape (a six pack is required) not be over 21. Once she has made her grand entrance you will fan her with a huge fan and feed her grapes. You will only need to be present for apx 30 mins max! You will be paid $75 for 30 mins. The event will be held on May 12th at 7pm-7:30----this will be a kids event. I just want to totally shock my daughter and give her the time of her life. Please send me 2 RECENT photos and why you would like to have this job, do not forget to include your phone number. College students feel free to apply.
Last Thursday, I was working out of the Starbucks on Navajo and Fletcher Parkway. This Starbucks -- like many Starbucks -- doesn't have enough electrical outlets for people to plug into. I find this to be highly annoying, especially since Starbucks is trying to court the laptop crowd. It is either a design flaw in their store roll-out plan or a deliberate attempt to limit the time people will spend in the store.
At any rate, I digress. Just had to get that off my chest.
I was sitting at a table, plugged into the closest electrical outlet -- which left one open. Two guys sit down at opposite ends of the table and begin to unpack. One guy hands me his power cord and asks if I'll plug him in. So, I take his cord and start to plug it in. At this point, the other fellow speaks up and says to this guy that he was about to plug in there. Then an argument breaks out over who was there first.
Now, these are not 15 or 16-year old kids; one guy looks to be in his 30s and the other fellow was at least 50. Neither guy would back down. The older guy then begins cussing out the younger guy. This is all unfolding right in front of me ... right in the middle of Starbucks. I really thought the old guy might start throwing blows.
I only had about 30 minutes of work left and knew that I had a fully-charged battery. I offered to unplug and let both of them plug in but the older guy wouldn't let me. Instead, he sat there and stewed while the other guy plugged in. When I finally left, he said "thanks" and proceeded to call the guy another name while he finally plugged in. The best part was ... they had to sit directly across from each other in order for both to be plugged in.
For a few seconds, I thought about grabbing another cup of coffee and just settling in to a comfy chair to watch.
If a fight had broken out, there may have been the workings of a class-action lawsuit against Starbucks for not having enough electrical outlets.
Just a few random thoughts about commercials I've seen over and over and over. First of all, you would think that guy on FreeCreditReport.com would have raised his credit score by now. What's wrong with this guy?
Why does that lady keep losing her car after all these months? Didn't she get one of those personal voice recorders months ago?
Who doesn't feel pity for the Geico caveman? I have to give it to Geico for consistently producing some of the funniest commercials on tv. I've even found myself singing the song that plays as the caveman goes through the airport ("everywhere I go, there's always something to remind me"). Plus, the mock news interview with the split screen is a classic.
I've seen this commercial for Florsheim shoes lately that has caught my eye. The tag line at the end says, "The Best. Again." This made me wonder ... did they experience a period of time when they weren't best and have just now recovered? Are they admitting to putting out sub-par shoes that were less than the best? Did I miss their "Yay, we're not as crappy as those other shoe manufacturers" campaign?
Now to be far, I have never purchased a new pair of Florsheims though I did wear a pair of my dad's Florsheim wingtips when I was in high school. I may not be the best judge of whether or not they are the best but I do chuckle at their tag line.
For auto manufacturers ... "It Runs. Again."
For restaurants ... "A Clean Bill of Health. Again."
Tonya's parents are returning to Memphis today and will be taking back some framed pictures. We went on the TSA website to see if it was possible to carry them on the plane even though they have glass. Of course, the TSA website said nothing about it but it did strictly prohibit carrying on the following items:
Axes and Hatchets
Cattle Prods
Crowbars
Hammers
Drills and drill bits (including cordless portable power drills)
Saws (including cordless portable power saws)
Billy Clubs
Black Jacks
Brass Knuckles
Kubatons
Night Sticks
Nunchakus
Stun Guns/Shocking Devices
Throwing Stars
Hand Grenades
You might read the title and assume that I'm going to rail against Wal-Mart on account of its healthcare benefits for employees or its consumption of global resources. Nope, not going to do it.
This is about bathroom access. Due to the rain, we went to Parkway Plaza, one of the few indoor malls in San Diego. I had a 2 PM coaching call and needed to use the restroom before sitting down for an hour. So ... I saunter into Wal-Mart only to find the men's restroom is being cleaned. The cleaning lady kindly directs me to go upstairs to another restroom ... only to find that it is being cleaned, too!
Now, I understand that it is possible to have two unanticipated accidents at the same time -- thus necessitating that both restrooms be cleaned. Of course, an "unanticipated" accident is different than the type of accident you plan for :-)
Or, it might just be poor coordination between the toilet scrubbers.
This little episode might have been forever lost if it hadn't been for the sign hanging prominently in the entrance to Wal-Mart: "Wal-Mart has been voted the top shopping experience in San Diego."
Nordstroms would never let something like this happen! Never!
A shameless plug for a new design. I did this in the aftermath of the midterm elections. ...
The caption says: "That whoopie cushion thing gets me everytime." Buy It Here
This little gem was actually created by an anonymous guitar player at LifePoint.
I heard this on the drive home and found this post online:
SAN DIEGO -- A man who police said robbed a bank in the Core-Columbia district collapsed from an apparent heart attack when a security guard confronted him outside the financial institution, authorities said Thursday.
The robber used a demand note to steal an undisclosed amount of cash from a Bank of America branch at 450 B St. about 11:10 a.m Wednesday, San Diego police said.The bank security guard followed the suspect outside and confronted him when he made a failed attempt at climbing a fence, said San Diego police Sgt. Kerry Tom.
The suspect, who is in his 60s, then collapsed from an apparent heart attack, Tom said, adding that he was taken to a hospital. His condition Thursday was not immediately disclosed.
Moral of the story? Robbing a bank is bad for your heart.
Due to my refusal to pump an endless stream of quarters into La Mesa parking meters, I typically park several blocks away from Cosmos and convince myself it's for my health. As I walk up Palm Avenue, I pass a United Methodist Church that has one of those message boards where they post upcoming sermon titles. I had to chuckle a few weeks ago when I saw this one:
"Simplify, Simplify, Simplify."
My first thought was ... wouldn't it have been simpler to just put "Simplify"?
